I was watching Oprah this evening which has a couple of guests who have been diagnosed with cancer yet they’ve got some of the best outlooks and attitudes on life then those of us who have years and years and years to live.
This first lady that I saw is so beautiful, she has such a radiance and light surrounding her. She lived life so, I dont even know how to describe it, she lived so Right, so Now, so Lively. Not only did she change her life physically, eating better and keeping up her health, she also is one of the happiest people you’d see. Realizing you cant worry about the future and she kept saying things like “right now im doing this and im having a good time.” For her, its about each moment. Like she said everyone dies…but we’re not all living.
The second was a man who has three young children who has been told he has only months to live. He gave a talk for his college classes and it recapped his life and his childhood dreams and all the wonderful things he has learned. He got up there and showed that he was as strong or stronger then most and he did push ups, he was straightforward and in the end just said that he was going to have fun. Just have fun. His main learnings were to show gratitude, to work well with others, being able to apologize, knowing when someone is tough on you its because they care.
This man talked about going after your childhood dreams, and every time theres an obstacle, its there to show you just how much you really want something by moving through the obstacles.
I think the number 1 thing, I took from this, was the first woman. She said “its like we need permission to start living,” saying that having cancer gave her permission, but we need to get away from that and truely just start living Now. Its so true though, as terrible as it seems, I almost want something life alterign to happen to me, something to jar me and give me that wake up call, so that I can give myself permission to start living life to the fullest.
I am asking myself right now…Why is it that I am not Living ultimately at the highest level right now, what is holding me back, what is stopping me? I so many times go over this, saying how much I have the passion, the desire, the love, the gratitude and excitement to live life at that level, so why do I catch myself playing less then full out in life.
And when I’m completely honest with myself, I can find the “reasons” or better said, my excuses for not living that way. I allow my surroundings and environment to “bring me down,” more in a sense of staying grounded…and calm…and not allowing myself to let go and be excited and happy about things. I allow people who surround me to influence me and I’ve realized that i start to ‘absorb’ their moods or their energy.
What needs to happen for me to break past that and be that lively, loving, joyous person that I am on the inside, to show outwardly?
As I embark on this personal journey of breaking restraints on living full out, I call on you to open your eyes to the beauty in everyday living, the beauty of life that we can all appreciate if we take things one moment at a time.

2 comments
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28 October 2007 at 1:18 am
Sandra
Thank you for your post and the sharing. It touched me.
You ask yourself a lot of questions that begin with “why”. In my eyes “why” is mostly pretty reproachful even and, yes, especially when said to ourselves
What is your biggest dream? Focusing on it changes a lot automatically. Maybe you even feel like “mind movie”-ing it. It is much fun to do that. I have done it myself and it gives you energy rises
Cheers
Sandra
21 December 2007 at 3:26 pm
Shawn Murphey, Inner Peace Activist
Very insightful writing. Have you come up with some thoughts about what needs to happen to break past and be that lively, loving, joyous person – on the outside too? I honor your courage in looking at the questions – so many don’t! I’ve spent years studying, writing, questioning. I look back at old journals filled with my musings. What’s been uncovered for me recently is that I may never have DECIDED to be joyous. To continue to choose to look for joy, to listen for joy, rather than the negative thoughts and ideas that always surround me. I used to hate hearing about choosing to be happy – “What garbage! After all, I’m miserable. How can I choose to be happy?” How humbling to find that “that garbage” might be true.
So, regarding your call to action: I am seeing beauty in the bright, crisp December day; in the luxurious fur of my cat; in the incredible technology of the computer I’m using; in the nimbleness of my fingers. Thank You!